Journey to Self-Discovery: Janet Philbin on Healing, Hypnosis, and Holistic Growth

Embrace the transformative journey to self-discovery and healing with Janet Philbin, the insightful clinical social worker and author behind "Show Up for Yourself: A Guide to Inner Awareness and Growth." Our enlightening conversation with Janet unveils the delicate dance between professional therapy and conscious parenting, where authority takes a backseat to companionship in guiding our children. Her Spiral of Healing framework is a revelation, offering an innovative path to personal evolution, while her book promises to steer you away from conventional self-help and towards a more profound understanding of your inner landscape through self-reflection and journaling prompts.

Get ready to shed your preconceptions about hypnosis as Janet demystifies this powerful therapeutic tool, debunking myths and allaying fears around mind control. We navigate the depths of emotional healing, confronting the fallacy of external pursuits of happiness and recognizing the imperative to fill our internal voids with authentic self-love and forgiveness. Janet's expertise illuminates the difference between constructive habits and addictive behaviors, offering a beacon of hope to those seeking to overcome personal struggles and embrace a life of balance and emotional well-being.

Transcript

Emily: 0:11

Welcome to the Open Forum in the Villages Florida podcast. In this show we talk to leaders in the community, leaders of clubs and interesting folks who live here in the villages to give perspectives of what is happening here in the villages Florida. We hope to add a new episode most Fridays at 9am. We are a listener supported podcast. There will be shoutouts for supporters and episodes. As a supporter you will get a direct email link to Mike. In season 5 we are making significant improvements and changes on an ongoing basis.

Mike Roth: 0:41

A note from the heart. Hello, dear listeners, I'm thrilled to share our passion project with you Podcast that brings joy, knowledge and inspiration. Creating it is a labor of love, even though it demands more time than I can easily spare. But hey, time isn't something that we can buy back right Now. Here's where you come in, the unsung hero.

Mike Roth: 1:03

You can help us keep the podcast alive and thriving, ow, by becoming a supporter. Three simple ways to support us. First, you can make a small monthly contribution. Visit our website, open Forum in the Villages, florida, and click on the supporter box. Even a humble $3-10 a month makes a difference. And guess what? You can cancel anytime, no strings attached, free and priceless. If your wallet is feeling a little light, no worries, you can still be a superhero, ow, by rating our podcast, give us those five shining stars or leave a review on your favorite podcast platform. Remember every click, every review, every share. It all adds up. Help us reach more years, touch more hearts and keep the podcast humming along in 2024 and beyond At the bottom of our podcasting hearts. Thank you, your support means the world to us. Stay curious, stay inspired and keep those headphones on.

Emily: 2:00

If you have a book that you would like to turn into an audiobook, let us know via email to mike a hvoice. com. Hope you enjoy today's show.

Mike Roth: 2:08

This is Mike Roth on Open Forum in the Villages, Florida. I'm here today to talk to book author Janet Philbin. Thanks for joining me, Janet.

Janet Philbin: 2:16

It is so nice to be here.

Mike Roth: 2:18

A couple of years ago, y janet wrote a book called Show Up for Yourself a guide to inner awareness and growth. Janet, maybe you can tell our listeners a little bit about your background that brought you to the point of writing the book.

Janet Philbin: 2:32

Oh, I'd love to. So my background is that I am a licensed clinical social worker and I have been for more than 30 years at this point and I have also been a certified hypnotherapist for about 20 years. I have been wanting to write a book for quite some time, and it took about five years from the ideas that began to formulate for the book until I actually wrote the book. I had a lot of stuff happening, but I didn't quite know what the book would be Actually. Back in 2019, I became a certified conscious parenting coach, and learning the philosophy and concepts of conscious parenting actually helped me to fuse all of my varying worlds and varying areas of expertise together, and the book was born conscious parenting is not a phrase that many of our listeners may be familiar with.

Mike Roth: 3:36

Can you give it a little bit of definition, Janet?

Janet Philbin: 3:38

Oh, I would love to. So. Conscious Parenting is something that's been talked about, I would say, since the early 2000s. In 2010, Dr Shafali Sabari wrote a book called the Conscious Parent, and she actually was on Oprah's Super Soul Sunday and has been on Oprah about four or five more times since with her following books.

Janet Philbin: 4:03

But Conscious Parenting is a belief that there is no hierarchy, that we are not parenting over our child, but instead parenting alongside of them, Not saying that the child is the one that's going to make the rules, but saying that the parent is going to honor the spirit of the child they are raising and walk alongside of them to support them, while providing the guidance and the boundaries that are needed so that children are seen as whole and complete and that there's nothing to fix and there's nothing wrong with them. And instead we support them in the person who they really are, as opposed to molding them into what the parent thinks the child should be. So, instead of being the parent you think your child needs, you're actually the parent your child needs you to be, and that's a big distinction.

Mike Roth: 5:02

So you wrote the book about four years ago 2020, April will be four years. Four years ago. And is the book? The first question people ask is is the book just another self-help book?

Janet Philbin: 5:14

My answer is always no, because I actually don't like self-help books. As a clinician, with a private practice.

Janet Philbin: 5:22

Yeah, I don't like them at all. Actually, I've had a private practice for 24 years now and I actually never recommend self-help books to my clients because I don't think anyone knows what you need. So I really think my book is a book about self-growth and self-exploration. It is not a how-to book Do this and do this and you're going to get that result. It is actually not that at all. It is a book that guides you through a journey into yourself by explanation, understanding and journal prompts throughout the book so you can actually apply what you're learning and reading as you go, and it brings you deeper into unraveling and deconstructing who you are, so you can actually get to know yourself better and therefore make the changes in your life you've been wanting to make and heal the parts of you that have been in pain for a long time.

Mike Roth: 6:21

Right and as I go through the book, there's a concept in the book called spiritual healing or spiral. I'm sorry. There's a concept in the book called spiral of healing. What is that and why is that important to people?

Janet Philbin: 6:34

Yeah, so the spirally healing is a concept that I came up with. It was something that came to me when I was away at a retreat, and the spiral healing has four components feel, heal, grow and love. And the spiral is not something that we do just once. It is something that goes around and around and it is something that takes you in order to lift you up. And the four components are important because we revisit these four components anytime. We're revisiting parts of ourselves that Need attention. So to feel something is actually being aware of the sensations that are in your body, and that's that's very important, because people don't really understand what feelings are. So once we become aware of the sensations within our body, we can then put our attention To helping the body begin to feel better. So that's the first, the first part of it.

Janet Philbin: 7:43

To heal means that we are looking at ways To relieve that pain and come back into more of a homeostasis within our self, and for our self to grow means you're breaking free. What are you gonna break free from? And then to love is all about self love. Really. What are you gonna do in your own self care that is loving of yourself, that is kind to yourself and for yourself. So anytime we look at an aspect of our self that's in pain, that needs healing, I believe we go through these four stages, and not necessarily in order, because they don't have to happen in order, but when you write a book, you have to put things in order because it needs to have some sort of Sense made out of it, but you don't necessarily go through the spiral in order. However, we revisit that spiral over and over again, time and time again. Each time we have to look back at something in our life that has been painful or uncomfortable and is disturbing us in the present.

Janet Philbin: 8:50

So is the spiral of healing important to older or senior citizens I think the spiral of healing is important to everyone, but especially someone who is older, who might Identify as a senior citizen, because everyone of every age, and especially someone who's live longer than other people, are going to have upsetting events that might have happened in their life that still disturbed them, maybe cause anxiety, depression, panic, isolation, loneliness and any other emotional Struggle that someone might be sitting with my oldest client that I've ever worked with to do this work that I do, which is inner child healing, was actually 83 years old and she went back and working with me.

Janet Philbin: 9:48

We went back to memories when she was six years old and things that happened with her parents growing up that she always struggled with and how they actually these are family dynamics from her family of origin were still impacting her relationship with her 80 year old sister and the extended family. So there is no timeline to healing. So anyone who's listening, no matter what age you are, it is never, ever too late to begin to start to feel better. No one has to struggle.

Mike Roth: 10:24

And what you got involved with the book. You were hypnotherapist. Why did you become hypnotherapist?

Janet Philbin: 10:31

I became a hypnotherapist because when I was in my private practice my clients would come to me and they would say things to me like I feel so alone and or I feel so sad or lost, and we would talk and talk and talk and I would do in sight oriented psychotherapy with them, talking and talking and talking, and we really didn't get anywhere. To be quite honest, a little bit, but like inches over months right.

Janet Philbin: 11:00

A mailing came to my office at the time. This was back in 2001,. Right, email wasn't what it was, the web wasn't what it was. You still got snail mail and it was for a hypnotherapy training center not far from my office that I never heard of and I decided to take the class.

Janet Philbin: 11:20

Hypnosis was always something that intrigued me. When I was in college. I was one of those people that raised my hand and got up on the stage and was part of the hypnotherapists show and I do tell that story in the book and so I knew it worked from a stage perspective. And after my training, which is a four month training, I started using these skills with my clients and my one client who was very stuck in her feeling of alonness. We were able to go back to the time when she was eight years old and how come she felt that alone, and what was happening in her family of origin, with her mother that left that feeling within her, and we were able to help that inner child of her, as he'll and I still see this client from time to time now and it's been 24 years she comes back and forth to therapy for varying different reasons and that that feeling of alonness has never returned Good good, that's pause.

Mike Roth: 12:16

Now, anet, for a quick Alzheimer's tip from Dr Craig Curtis. Dr Curtis, what can someone do if they know that they have Alzheimer's that runs in their family?

Dr. Craif Curtis: 12:26

So there's a lot that they can do so, published actually in the Journal of the American Medical Association in February of 2024. So this month this was a study done primarily at Rush University in Chicago, looking at those with brain amyloid, so those people that already have amyloid. Can a healthy lifestyle protect them from developing dementia? And the answer was yes, by following these five healthy habits that were tracked, and those were they did not smoke, they did moderate exercise for at least 150 minutes a week, they kept their alcohol consumption to a minimum, approximately one to two drinks a day, and they regularly stimulated their brain by reading, going to museums, etc. And the final category was how well they followed the mind diet or a Mediterranean type diet, and they used autopsies. They actually used approximately 530 autopsies to prove that those that followed those healthy lifestyle habits or had those healthy lifestyle habits actually had less amyloid. It correlated those had less amyloid in their brain.

Warren: 13:36

With over 20 years of experience studying brain health, Dr Curtis's goal is to educate the village's community on how to live a longer, healthier life. To learn more, visit his website craigcurtismd. com, or call 352-500-5252 to attend a free seminar.

Mike Roth: 13:52

Janet can you talk about healing being an inside out process and share a little bit more about what you started earlier.

Janet Philbin: 14:01

Yeah, so thank you for that question. Healing, I believe, is an inside out process. It's always been how I practiced in my work with my clients that we can't look to the outside to help us feel better on the inside, because it just doesn't stick. I think we have lots of holes inside us, These are emotional wounds that are within us and we carry these holes around us our whole life. So we look to things outside to make us happy. If I have that meal, if I watch that funny movie, if I watch a video on YouTube, whatever it is everyone has different things that they like to do to make them feel happy.

Janet Philbin: 14:47

The problem is when that event is over, when the movie ends, when you finish the book, when you're no longer with your friend, the feeling of sad or aloneness comes back because you're trying to fill what's hurting inside with an external filler. It just doesn't work. There's no long term way to get it to stick. So we have to do is we have to heal from the inside out, and when we do that we can heal those holes and fill them with self love, compassion, empathy, understanding, forgiveness. Then we can become a whole W? H O L E and what we are taking from the outside. The funny movie now has a place to stick. Really great visit with that family member or friend. Good feeling has a really nice place to stick inside and then it's ours to keep.

Janet Philbin: 15:37

It doesn't slip through. So we heal from the inside out. We're actually reclaiming ourselves.

Janet Philbin: 15:43

We're actually saying, wow, I am worth it but that was of it, with people Alcoholics and using alcohol to close that hole for fill that hole addictions happen because people are looking to fill holes and fill voids in themselves, and so they start with a little bit of alcohol and they feel better. But then that little bit of alcohol isn't enough because the pain comes back, so they drink more and more and more. It goes for any kind of addiction, whether someone's using food, alcohol, drugs or screen addiction. It's even someone who's an exercise addict. Anything in excess is in excess for reason, I think, as a cover up to not feel the pain that's actually inside.

Mike Roth: 16:28

I know a few of the exercise, or whole excess, what I call. They have to hit the gym five days a week for at least an hour a day, Janet.

Janet Philbin: 16:38

I don't know if that's. I just want to clarify for your podcast, for any of your listeners. I don't think that going to the gym an hour a day, five days a week, is someone who's an exercise a holic. I think that's actually quite healthy. Someone with an exercise addiction would be at the gym four or five hours a day, seven days a week, and actually would feel not well, not able to function, not good about themselves, if they didn't exercise to that capacity in that way all the time.

Mike Roth: 17:07

So that's really over the top four or five hours a day. Yeah okay, what are some of the common myths about hypnosis, and then we can talk about why hypnosis works to help people heal their emotional pain and traumas.

Janet Philbin: 17:21

Yeah, that's great. I think there are so many myths around hypnosis. I think the first thing people think of when they hear hypnosis is they think someone's going to take out a pendulum and swing it in front of someone's eyes and they're just going to close their eyes and go unconscious. Now, while I do own a pendulum, I don't use it to hypnotize people. So one of the myths is people who are hypnotized will surrender and become powerless and lose self control. That's just simply not true.

Janet Philbin: 17:51

The truth is, under hypnosis your awareness is heightened and when you're hypnotized you are actually in control of yourself. Hypnotist is never more in control of your mind than you are. Another popular myth reason why people are afraid to do hypnosis is that people are afraid they will share their secrets under hypnosis. And once again, under hypnosis you will not share anything that you do not want to share. You are in control. And in fact, something happens under hypnosis called this vangali effect. And this is the assumption that a person, under hypnosis, can be made to do something against their will. Again, not true. It's only in stage hypnosis that people will do things funny, quote unquote. But actually, under hypnosis you will never do anything that is not ethically or morally comfortable for you.

Mike Roth: 18:47

Right. I've seen stage hypnosis many times and it's my impression that the hypnotist will bring 20 people up to the stage and attempt to induce hypnosis, and the ones who are least susceptible he sends back to the audience and he narrows it down to maybe four or five that are most susceptible and they got up there because they wanted to be under hypnosis and maybe do something strange on stage, like walk around like a chicken.

Janet Philbin: 19:14

You are 100% correct, because no one can be hypnotized without wanting to be hypnotized, because all hypnosis is self-hypnosis and the hypnotist does not have power over the client's mind. Another myth is that under hypnosis the client can be put to sleep. You are not asleep when you're in hypnosis. You are in a deep, altered state of consciousness.

Janet Philbin: 19:38

Now, have people fallen asleep on me during hypnosis? They have, and you can tell, because they snore or their breathing changes or they stop responding to questions. And at this point, when I was in person with people in my office, I would have to, like gently tap them on the shoulder and say their name and bring them out a little bit Not awake, quote unquote but into a little more awareness, so we could actually use the hypnosis, because you can't help someone in hypnosis if they're sleeping. So I think those are like some of the most common myths that I always like to bust, because I think people don't do hypnosis because they're so afraid that they're not going to be in control. And in fact you're in more control when you're in hypnosis, because your awareness is actually heightened, not diminished.

Mike Roth: 20:33

Okay, good, Janet, when you were in private practice, did you have a specialty for using hypnosis?

Janet Philbin: 20:39

Yes, initially I was using hypnosis with all of my clients, but my practice at the time, in the early 2000s, was mostly focused on people going through infertility. So I developed a hypnosis fertility treatment that I used with people when they were also in medical treatment and people were very successful in getting pregnant. Now I can't say come do hypnosis and you'll get pregnant. But what I can tell people, no matter what your medical condition is, if you go do hypnosis, you're going to get through your medical treatment emotionally more successfully because you will be able to reduce your stress levels. Nowadays I don't really do hypnotherapy for infertility anymore. My practice has changed. I work a lot with I only work with adults, number one but I work with people who want to heal from their emotional pain and trauma.

Mike Roth: 21:38

Do you work with only people in New York? Who can people in any place in the country work with you?

Janet Philbin: 21:43

Not any place in the country. I am licensed in 10 states, lorida being one of them, and so I can work with people in any of those 10 states.

Mike Roth: 21:53

Something like a Zoom telephone call.

Janet Philbin: 21:55

It would all be over video. I have a compliant video platform.

Mike Roth: 21:58

Okay, okay, very good. So in reading your book, Janet, you got a lot of chapters in there. It's almost a 280 page book. What is your favorite chapter?

Janet Philbin: 22:08

Oh, no one has ever ever asked me that question before. Great question.

Mike Roth: 22:13

I've been accused of asking great questions before.

Janet Philbin: 22:16

Well, that would be a good thing. Wow, I have to think about this a minute. Actually, I'm sitting here with my book in front of me and I'm looking at all the chapters and I think the chapter I'm most proud of is chapter 10, the spiral of healing, because that was something that was the thing that I knew needed to be in a book. But I didn't know how the book would be ever written or what it would become or how it would become. And I remember the day I finished writing that chapter and I took the PDF image of my drawing from my journal, which is on page 151 of the spiral of healing, how I drew it out that day and I'm not an artist, but I remember seeing that go into the document that would become the book and I felt really proud of myself that day because I was like I am bringing something that was not in the form based worlds into form, into reality, into something that people can touch and see and read.

Mike Roth: 23:22

That spiral was done in 2015.

Janet Philbin: 23:25

Yes, it was.

Mike Roth: 23:26

If someone wanted to buy your book, how would they do that?

Janet Philbin: 23:29

It is available on Amazon and it is available anywhere you can get an e-book, so it's on like Apple Books Barnes Noble as digital book. If you want to paperback, you have to go to Amazon and I'm in the process of recording the audio book and my goal is to release the audio book in April, on the four year anniversary of the print edition. So I'm working on that right now.

Mike Roth: 23:58

And our listeners might be interested in that. So, Janet, after people read the book if they want to find out more about becoming a client, how do they do that?

Janet Philbin: 24:07

All anyone needs to do is to go to my website, janetphilbin. com, . om. om P-H-I-L-B-I-N, and there's actually a link on the website to book a complimentary 30 minute consultation, and there's other information on the website too, so people can learn all about me, read my articles and there's a couple of classes on there. People can purchase and also links to the book, and if you're not sure, if you want to buy the book but you want to test it out, you can actually download the first chapter for free right from my website.

Mike Roth: 24:41

That's a good idea. So, Janet, is there anything else you want to add before we sign out?

Janet Philbin: 24:46

This has been a great conversation. Thank you so much for having me on your show.

Mike Roth: 24:50

And thanks for being on the show. Janet, You're welcome.

Emily: 24:54

I'll see you all next time on the show. Remember our next episode will be released next Friday at 9am. Should you want to become a major supporter of the show or have questions, please contact us at m com. com. This is a shout out for supporters Tweet Ed, ed Williams and major supporter Dr Craig Curtis at n h Th . the villages. We will be hearing more from Dr Curtis with short Alzheimer's tips each week. If you know someone who should be on the show, contact us mike@rothvoice. com mikeatrothvoicecom. This v voice is copyrighted by Rothvoice 2024, all Rights Reserved.